Friends

If you know me very well you know that am that type of person who would take a bullet for his people. I find myself many times choosing sacrifice just to make things go forward, found myself paying all the bills, giving all my time and attention into a friendship.My whole idea of friendship has been built on a foundation of transaction , I do this for you you do this for me . If you cant do the same thing am doing for you then you don’t love me. You don’t appreciate me as a friend the same way I appreciate you.

I have been into the energy movement so much that I found myself cutting people off because they cant reciprocate or give the exact same energy that am putting .Cutting people off just because they are not there when I need them even if I don’t tell them that am in need of their attention and I know most of us do this . This alone led me into a hole so deep I couldn’t get myself out . I thought I had this friendship thing figured out only to find that every few weeks I found myself alone and lonely with no one simply because in my love myself , keep your energy mantra I happened to push everyone I hold dear away .

What does it mean to be someone’s friend, what does it all mean to have friends? I have now realized that it is a very special relationship that needs to be treated the same way you carry your father’s road runner eggs . With care and constant monitoring of the environment and the way that it is changing . For me it means to cast aside all my insecurities about life putting them on the table and deciding to put them out in the open .This is mainly for two reasons one so that I am understood and two that I communicate better in an effective way that makes sure that the other half of the pie clearly hears me out. Being a friend means I don’t have to be like you or agree with everything that you do but I have to support your dreams , to be there for you when you need me that is even when I make wrong decisions and you told me not to. This might seem unfair but the gist of the story is that we want to move away from being visceral beings , the notion is that as a friend we are being challenged to love and to act everyday like how Jesus did who in essence loved so much he gave his own life for us. Being a friend means to constantly be the voice of reason in our person’s life not to be a “yes man” and this alone takes much courage.

We are in a time where everyone is asking for real. We ask for the truth but we’re never really ready for honesty . I know everyone wants to be treated well and to be loved preferrably more than they love themselves. Yet somehow the reality is honesty and real can be harsh. We all want good things from life we want friends that would die for us . Truth is are we friends worth to die for? Can you safely say that you have been so good to someone they would rather die for you than see you suffer. The first step is in realizing that we have to be what we want from people. We should let our actions speak louder than our intentions and ideas.You want a ride a die be that to someone.

You want eternal support be the foundation in someone else’s life, the pith of the nyaya is that “ its not all about you , it was never about you … its about how you treat others”.Is it out of love, compassion, respect , genuine care?

Some Dalai llama would say “you get what you give so why not give what you want to get”

J Cole said “you cant be everything to everybody” but am sure you can be everything to somebody and it doesn’t hurt.

Its not wrong to give your all so that your peer can feel better or be better. My advice is that surround yourself with people that have the same principles as you that lead you to Christ because I believe the end goal is to go to Heaven , so why not be with people that make sure that you go there or rather that edify and make you a better person . 

“Intuition can see through illusive intent” – HER

I have realized that this isn’t just true in relationship but in friendship as well. We need to be careful of the friends we keep. Some people are only there when it suits their needs. We call those leaches not friends. 

We are constantly asked to do everything out of love so it doesn’t matter if your input is shot down just because its all love from here. If its all love it doesn’t matter if they do the same or reciprocate , lets be content with that fact.

A friend is someone who will hold your hand through everything that comes at you in life, a friend will always be there for you …in your weeping , rejoicing,celebrations , mourning etc. Are you being that person? Its important to be a good friend to your people. All in the hope that by loving them you bring out the best in them and therefore open doors to endless possibilities in their lives.

“Because A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity“. (Proverbs 17:17 )

Lets be better human beings and be the change that we want to see in our relationships